Awareness of the Woodland

I was so grateful and surprised by the amount of readers of my last diary, i had gone astray for this week and was going to write about our innate wellbeing but i stopped myself as this is a diary and not a psychology blog. I like to weave the wisdom i have found within my diary as a life story but i want to write something which is meaningful to me that nurtures my own soul and feel real.

I was somewhat stuck and around 3am on Tuesday morning i realised thats exactly what i am doing with my idea with Forest Bathing blog that this isn’t really me. I always go back to a book by Maxwell Maltz “ Psycho-Cybernetics” of adjusting our path when we stray off. Becoming true to yourself is not easy as the demands of needing income deflects us away. It goes deeper than that for me : I am still trying to fit into a world , still trying to prove negative comments wrong , still trying to be someone i am not but my mind wont let go of this lie that thinks they are right.

The next days forecast was about 1 degree and dry so that was my outdoor painting window as it looked like a lot of rain and maybe snow to come. I had decided to ask the part of woodland i was to sit painting for inspiration and guidance. “Was there something you would like to say that would help people ? “ and “what could i do to say it" ?”. I sat there and told the woodland that my struggles wasn’t of creation but of my attachments to financial security and limited self belief of other peoples perception of my work, which keeps on poking its nose into my life. I asked the woodland to show me an unmistakeable sign to what i should do.

This time in the woodland i had tried out a different form of gestural movement , as i cannot visualise i sat and physically mimicked what felt like japanese “Shodo” , something a long time ago i was interested in. Only the woodland saw me dancing making gestural shapes of moss dangling from tree roots ! Whilst walking back through the forest i noticed a solitary old leaf dangling and it was crumpled , the colours were to die for and i realised that its the intimate landscape in which holds its language , the small , the insignificant which tells the story of life.

The woodland knew me , it knew my heart , it new my struggles , it new my authenticity . When sit in the woodland and we let go of our thoughts and let go of which observes our thoughts , what remains is awareness , but it isn’t just our own awareness as sitting breathing next us is nature aligning to our awareness , the trees , the moss and lichen , the clumps of grass and fallen branches and twigs being reclaimed back to begin a new cycle. They all know you are there and listen intently as its nature which hold you , loves and accepts you as you.

Maybe i am doing enough and that its having faith of divine timing which is needed, The attachments create insecure grasping which generate illusions covering over our innate wellbeing so we cannot see our truth , our life intentions , our gifts, our peace , our authenticity and need to be ourselves.

Hareshaw Linn

In the dark and mysterious winter woodland with gnarly rose hips , darkened stray leaves , moss covered trees and fallen branches slowly mulching back to nourish the woodland there are small saplings with golden leaves still strong like an golden leafed elven trees in a fairy story marking your way-finding along the path to the waterfall. They look like they are a special winter tree as all other trees lie barren and i cannot resist photographing them , i call them hope trees as they endure with dignity through the darkest and coldest months.

Little baubles of red still illuminate the sides of the path approaching the path which provide much needed food but its too cold for little birds to venture from their nests so the tree lies dormant of singing birds. My wanders into when will these berries depart to allow new growth and fruit for the next year.

It is time for wandering through tree enclaves whilst its winter to discover twisting shapes and wonderful saturated bands of colours on trees. The moss creates something timeless , something ancient and something unexplainable as it draws us into their realms with an offer of magic. But , it offers more , it provides an insight into what is covered up during summer , what holds everything together , its strength and resilience. Now , in the summer , i know where there are secret paths and fairy enclaves. Now i can see that behind insecurities is my wellbeing ready to hold me in resilience

Bakethin Nature Reserve

The low morning light coming across Kielder Water from Falstone streams through the woodland by the reservoir edge illuminating the backs of the trees and tops of the mossy tree stumps inviting you in. Is there a promise of something or is it the trees want to see and meet this wanderer, i cannot resist the temptation of delving a little deeper and into new parts. Is it that the trees want me to see more and show the world they are more than just an instagram image but something real.

Wandering through the frosty parts although the air is cold there is an accepting warmth , a feeling of relief that its deep penetrating cold heals the underworld and there is beauty , the sprinkling of snow pops the greens on the moss , the leaves take new forms and contrast beautifully with the forest floor.

Spending time with mindful noticing and connecting to its beauty changes how your mind perceives the world , you evolve , you heal and it gives you hope. Go out , be tender and just get close to everything as it was a loved one.

Once again my Robin friend eagerly awaits to show me more to photograph.

In the Wild , Painting

My gestures are not

motionless

they shift each and every

moment

directing my attention

to something

mutable

impermanent

which my eyes cannot

see

but my marks can.

christopher evans

Top left : Watercolour on 33 x 50 cm Fabrinno Oil Paper

Top right : Watercolour on 50 x 65 cm Fabrinno Oil Paper

Middle left : Watercolour on 140 x 210 mm Watercolour sketch book

Middle right : Watercolour on 170 x 250mm Leda Supplies sketchbook

Bottom : Watercolour on A3 Canson Watercolour Paper

Bull Crag Peninsular

Each part of Bull Crag seems to have its moments at different times and then some places the moments are like emotions created by the weather and each time i wander through i am drawn to them once again. I stand there looking , partially unrecognising i have been there before photographing and then it dawns on me the different moods have different qualities and it was the quality which i was drawn to.

It brings thoughts about moods , and that perhaps instead of resisting them we should love them and tell youself “ I love my dark mood this morning “ maybe there is beauty there you are missing !

I feel this in the small things as they flavour the woodland with joy and fun.

The healing from a woodland is the deep appreciation of beauty , it activates positive chemistry and changes how we perceive the world in better and more helpful ways. Just don’t let beauty be skin deep , or instagram deep ! Find forms , find grass , find broken twigs as the greater your depth of love the more it heals.

The woodland does not ask for something in return , it loves you unconditionally. The reciprocity is to be its friend , to keep it clean , to respect it and to protect it.

I love contrast as this part of Kielder delivers that in spades. One moment i am wandering through saturated glistening trees with nuances of colours containing embellishments of beautifully coloured moss , bluey green lichens and the odd lingering leaf reluctant to return back to the underworld.

As you had forgotten that its a frosty day a new section delights you , a frozen trackway through a tee plantation or a maze of white coated twigs brighten the path. Sometimes there is a little of both , an old Cow Parsley along with its friends still enjoying the reservoir views have a wee coating of frost when you investigate.