A weekly journal with Trees , Flora and Fungi , Photography , Mindful Wanderings and My Life Journey in Kielder Forest.
My 14 days holiday seemed forever i had stopped doing and let myself be still and silent without external stimuli especially electronic devises. I needed some space and be able just to sit without being reactive to thoughts , leaving them alone to teach my body that i do not need to put into action everything which enters my mind. I also have been working on the constant narrative of what i am doing , bringing back my past and various ways creating negative thoughts about my future. It became exhausting ! .
I did combine some woodland wanderings with taking photographs. My “ Meet a Tree “ needs constant fresh supply , i had also taken advantage of the time to go out to collect images for my “The Hidden Colours of Autumn” Gallery as last year i missed out and i wanted to be ahead of the colour curve.
I went to Donkleywoods which is a few miles from my home with great expectations of it being a place i can visit in 2027 for my website and i was a wee bit disappointed to find most of the woodland is within private ownership but i did manage to find some lovely trees. I had a trip up along Kielder Forest Drive to find some trees and with a end goal of reaching Hindhope Linn. A Linn is a pool beneath a waterfall , its a bit of combination of ancient briton and old english language, and often steeped in folklore especially fairies in Northern Britain.
It was 1 degree cold along the drive with pale blue far reaching skies and although road surface demands slow driving , why would you want to drive fast ? Hindhope Linn is part of an ancient woodland combined with Forestry and the moment i entered it i knew straight away this is it. I wont go too far into this as i will be visiting here every month over 2027 along with Sidwood which is about 10 miles south : both are part of the Kielder Forest expanses.
Stella ( The cat ) turned 11 on the 13th and it was also my Mums birthday the same day. Stella had her favourite tin of tuna and spent most of it asleep on my lap.
I am pleased to be back as i have been making some quite big changes which i am excited about.
I eventually decided that i want my painting to be personal to my own spiritual journey and that trying to force it into commercialism had caused quite a lot of friction in me which was affecting my creative output. I closed down my expensive , mostly un-visited website. I am still going to do a weekly art show but it will be based on “Medium” which is free and people can subscribe to it and get my work direct to their emails if they like.
Thinking back a few years i realised i began something centred around photography of people and events which failed , i did some organisation events but mostly i went to places like Edinburgh Fringe and a Anti Fracking Event etc, which i created printed zines , i also spent time with dance group which ended in a disaster due to a publisher. What i realised over the last weeks was although the publisher was being bad it was my fault in allowing others to control my life and that i need to stop seeking permission and validation from others. I also realised the reason why it did not turn into something was my lack of clarity , direction and focus : not being hard on myself as i was struggling with my mental health but its a lesson i needed to see for myself : The belief isn’t about something within you but turning up for yourself a having a go and editing until its right.
I have been forming and re-forming parts of this website over the last few months and adding a lot more clarity, direction and focus on what i want it to do. I looked at my finances to be able to focus on creating this website mission , i was getting quite anxious about sustainability but that was really self doubt in my abilities to find solutions and use resources to help me navigate my Neuro-divergent mind rather than use it as a block. My savings were meant for me to re-create , re-imagine a new life and instead of fearing using the money as it felt like failure i have realised two things : when i began my construction consultancy in 2010 i had no back up , no savings, it was a middle of a financial crisis and i had a huge outgoing which i managed to work it. Secondly by leaning into owning what i want to do , giving myself the permission to do what i need to do to make it work , stop asking the wrong people for help and show up for myself.
Bakethin Nature Reserve
I had tentative plans for the Bakethin Hide side to make my images for this month , i knew i had to get some but i was on holiday and just really wanted to wander through for a few hours. At first it was going to Bakethin Hide side and just cover this area as i can also find some spots for returning to paint in the forest. But , when i drove past the image above i instantly turned around and parked at Matthews Linn. I wanted to sit here with a cup of coffee and soak in the beautiful day : its amazing how everything just falls away when you submit yourself to natures invitation to connect.
I am going back to Bakethin Hide side today , i havent missed a beat of this place since i moved here in April 2025 and i am beginning to know it intimately. As i often visit here just for a Sunday walk or to paint i wont be missing it in 2027 when i focus on two other places for my journal and website.
I had been thinking a lot about stories and labels for plants. A lot of the folklore is centred around fairy lore and i would never wish to upset them so i asked whether they would be offended if i created my stories and have my own names for the plants i encounter. We can create our own magical connections to nature by creating a relationship to them , there isn’t one plant which doesn’t have different common names or folklore surrounding them. The Fairies have their own names and relationships which are different to humans as their reality is different : so they said “yes please, you would have nick names for friends and private stories which you share , why not include the plants and trees”
What if the blackberry story is centred around your own life , maybe they can be associated with family days picking them and making pies afterwards to share out rather than the Devil falling on the prickly thorns ! Maybe the hawthorn can be associated with your heart and each year you make a winters cordial to drink hot whilst sitting in the woodland. What if i want to individually call a tree by a name rather than calling all the Rowan trees “ Rowan trees” ?
I think this could bring alive the woodland or any natural place for each person. When i met my ex-wife she was from North Yorkshire and called Blackberries , Brambles which i did not have a clue what she was talking about , so perhaps we can share our names with others or just keep them personal.
The Fly Agaric was not in its usual place this year , perhaps it is coming later and for the best part of my visits to all three i could not find any until a little shout out along a verge where one solitary one. All fungi are beautiful but i just love its striking red and that not everything in autumn is of an earthy colour.
Seeking mushrooms is like once you have seen one then suddenly you see lots and lots emerging from everywhere. It is like they are keeping themselves magically hidden until they know your intentions. My intentions are just to share their wonder to everyone .
The speckled leaves of the birch trees create such depth and texture which was once a wall of dark green hiding the silvery tree trunks and now the light shimmers through the more transparent and yellowy leaves to revealing that behind the mirage of green there is a whole other world behind. There are two moments of this magic , one in spring when the new leaves are formed which creates a wonderful pointillism affect and right at this moment.
As i wander through i am looking for little stories and nature using nature and although there are plump blackberries to be found i love the ones which have dried and supported by quickly turning leaves which a spider has taken as its home for an autumn feast.
In the Quiet of the Wild
My weekly encounter began with ideas of a gnarly Hawthorn tree with some rose hips creeping up it along the North Tyne River close to my home but turned into something entirely different. I began with a small response on A4 paper and made a complete mess of what i was doing. I just was not connecting which conflicted with my creative output and my painting turned into a large splodge of horridness. I stopped , stillness was the answer as always, and just sat in my outdoor chair enjoying my surroundings and breathing in the fresh air and there it was directly in front of me in the verge full of dying plants , everyone would walk past , a lot would wonder why i even connected to a mess of dying plants. But for me , it was beautiful , it told a story of life , i had energy of passing life and when you looked at the chaos of stripped back stalks there were a whole new world thriving containing rose hips which feel like energy points , metamorphic leaves becoming transparent. With my new connection i explored how that translated firstly with smaller pieces creating small paper responses including pencil and crayon with my watercolours and finally a large piece which this time i spent building up the charcoal and paint plein air and then mono printing within the studio into my final piece which took two goes for the paint and marks to find their own story.
Small Encounters | Small Responses
Pencil , Crayon & Watercolour on A3/A4 Paper
Larger Traces | Felt Senses
Pencil , Charcoal & Watercolour Mono Print on A2 Paper
Bull Crag Peninsular
I wanted to share another moment of beautiful wild flowers enjoying a great view before they disappear for next year.. In my quest to connect to these wild flowers of finding my own stories and names i did not find their given names as i may of stated in other weeks.
These are my clock flowers , they shoot up so quickly in Spring , filling the wild verges practically everywhere i visit. They grow tall with lovely light green leaves and the have delicate light purple flowers which as time goes into autumn the flowers make their way to its very top and then leave lilac tendrils once they have gone exactly when autumn is upon us. But , this wild flower keep on giving as now the leaves turn into glowing golden amber leaves.
It was a honour to spend 5 minutes together admiring the reservoir on a beautiful cold morning.
Due to the lack of rain and high temperatures the “conkers” have not filled out as expected but i will keep on coming along to see their changes as it dries out and eventually falls to the ground. My dad used to soak them in vinegar and heat them in the oven to convert them for playing “ Conkers” .
It was not until i got into the second wooded part after the old road along the reservoir that fungi started to pop up and my first time i found the orange Stagshorn fungi beside a Pine Tree : I have a known place in Bakethin where it comes up so i was excited to see it here. The sun had illuminated them beside the track through the higher parts of Bull Crag woodland. I love this part , it has been left alone by Forestry England and is becoming quite special.
I watched a youtube podcast with Vandana Shiva the Indian Environmental Activist who i have a lot of respect for but i did not agree that plantations are dead spaces just for logs. The trees existed before humans and although Larch is not native to Britain it has naturalised and when left alone can create wonderful woodlands full of life.
My love affair with Cow Parsley continues through its life cycle and continues to delight me with its form and remaining seed heads glittering in the sunlight.
The turning leaves of the Birch has now began to embellish the turned yellow ochres with reddy browns in little splodges like a watercolour wet on wet by Hilma Af Klint. When you step back from the tree and witness it as a whole you can see that the mixtures have created an overall feeling as one colour
Hareshaw Linn
I must admit i came here quite a few times over the last few weeks , i told myself that i needed to colours from the leaves but apart from enjoying its presence my local town is nearby and there is a bakery which i love their pies and sandwiches and whilst on holiday they are my treats.
The Rose Hips are in so much abundance than the year before and by now they are naked of the leaves and await a critter to eat or gracefully return back to the earth. I love finding them when they are old a shrivelled , dark and mysterious. I think next year we will make some Rose Hip Cordial and find my own story and name.
Darkened crimson brown stalks create such mysterious forms and lure me into wanting to draw them along with the highlighted white seed heads looking proud on the remaining bare sienna stalks. I see them and they see me !
In comparison to last year at this time the Woodland does not have a lot of Fungi to be found and i scoured the less frequented and hidden paths to see whether they are hiding from human activity. I did find a little colony beside a fallen tree.
What was once dense green foliage the Chlorophyll has broken down and what was once dark opaque green into light yellowy green which are more transparent allowing in dappled light in to illuminate the pathways so much i would not of been surprised to see an elf or a fairy there.
As the leaves depart leaving the exposed branches right at this moment some of them have one or two lightly coloured leaves still dance amongst the branches like musical grace notes reminding us on its summer glory and graceful return back to the underworld so we can re-imagine a spring to come.
